You see them in meeting rooms, at family gatherings, in government offices. They wear suits or sensible shoes or carry briefcases that suggest a kind of mastery you haven’t yet achieved. Their confident strides and measured tones create an impression of certainty – these are people who know what they’re doing. These are THE ADULTS.
But…they don’t exist.
You may have first sensed this one ordinary Tuesday afternoon, sitting in a boardroom as someone with gray at their temples presented a strategy with absolute conviction. Something in their eyes flickered – just for a moment – and you caught it: they were guessing. Or perhaps it was when you watched your parents navigate a difficult decision, and realized they were simply trying their best with limited information, just as you would.
Some evenings, in quiet moments at home, even the most seemingly competent individuals remove their professional masks and sit, slightly bewildered, wondering how they’ve ended up responsible for mortgages or children or entire departments. They check their phones while brushing their teeth, rapidly scanning the messages, mentally racing to keep track of all the things they’ll have to be on top of the next day.
At first you can’t quite believe it; you keep on expecting to be inundated by some wave of maturity, but it never arrives. You tell yourself that eventually you’ll feel ready, prepared, complete – like the mythical adults you imagined in childhood.
You are going to have to let yourself go under. You steer well clear of the comfortable illusion that someone more qualified will rescue you or tell you exactly what to do.
Waiting for adulthood is impossible; pretending to have arrived is pointless.
Figure it out yourself, and do it. Not because you’ve become an adult, but because you’ve realized there never were any to begin with.